..Less than a month to go now, I really wanted a June wedding but we couldn't get the time off during the exam period, so we're having a July wedding instead.Julie and Jackie are chief bridesmaid and best man, but we're not sure which way round, luckily as they're twins they're the same size and shape, so will fit either outfit, we'll probably end up tossing a coin on the day. Pixie and Tina are my other bridesmaids.Geoff has pulled some strings and we're getting married at an estate in Cheshire in proper celebrity style, but without the celebrities and their associated hangers on.At the moment all is still relatively calm, Pixie is sorting the flowers, Tina is sorting the decorations and the food, Jade, our new friend, has designed the invitations and posted them. She's also arranged the photographer, I hope it's not one of her glamour modelling connections as I want this to be a proper decent wedding and I'm keeping my dress on as long as possible. And what a dress it is going to. Do you still want to be here Christopher?"I stared at the ground. "Yes ma'am." Good, then come with me." She pulled me into the bathroom and had mestand in the bathtub, "I think we need to beat this superiority out ofyour mind young man," she took the ladies razor from the sink andbegan sliding it down my legs before I could protest, "I'm tired ofwashing all this nasty hair, it isn't becoming of a child likeyourself." Stop it!" I yelled out, trying to escape the tub.She grabbed my ear, "that's enough silliness. I've realised that Ireally must stop asking you things and simply do them. You are just achild after all." I stood in stunned silence as cleared me of anybodily hair, including, incredibly, my pubic and armpit hair."You're mad," I said slowly, "raving mad." I looked down at myself andmy hairless body, forced into an appearance of a pre-pubescent."Yes, that's so much better and easier to wash now," she replied, "andmore befitting of your new station. Elizabeth and I shave.
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